Death is a difficult thing to deal with. And sometimes it happens unexpectedly. But if you have the wherewithal to think about somethings ahead of time, you can reduce the stress you will encounter going through the funeral preparation process. Last year I experienced the passing of my spouse of 42 years, so this experience was quite traumatic for me. However, God prepared me for this to a degree. I had the experience of orchestrating two previous funerals-my mother’s and my father’s. But I will be very honest and tell you that I could not have done this one without the help and support of my two daughters. I just didn’t have the energy I had when my parents passed away more than 30 years ago.
So, I would like to share with you some things you’ll have to address. The list is overwhelming, however there are some duties that you can delegate to others. The more relatives or friends you can delegate duties to, the better. You can use this as a sample. This involves the survivors preparing to relocate a few months after the funeral.
1st Person 2nd Person 3rd Person
| Verify date of death; authorize autopsy | Get financial statements from #3 person | Work on Deceased Bedroom |
| Give name of funeral home to hospital | Call creditors regarding any balances | Clean out Closets |
| Call Life Insurance co. regarding death | Have any balances not written off sent to the estate. | Group clothes by category (ie. Dresses) |
| Call Social security regarding death | Go through voicemails on landline | Take pictures of items to be donated |
| Social Security will notify Medicare | Go through emails on phone & close out | Bag and label items to be donated |
| Call Medigap regarding death | Respond to Facebook condolences | Contact Charitable Org. & schedule p/u |
| Notify all doctors regarding death | Remove from Facebook | Empty All dresser drawers |
| Notify Pastor of church regarding death | Remove from Twitter | Look for important Papers |
| Notify relatives and friends re: death | Remove from Instagram | Separate financial papers from rest |
| Determine type of memorial | Remove from present Mobile Company | Give financial papers to Executor |
| Ask who would to speak | Move over to different Mobile Company | Bag non-dd valuables |
| If music-determine what/number of songs | Send death certificates to necessary part, | Strip Bed |
| Coordinate details with pastor | Create family plan for 2nd member | Throw out given items |
| Relay vital statistics to funeral director | Prepare to downsize primary member | Vacuum room |
| Order death certificates | Inform Rental agencies of departure | Throw out trash |
| Order urn | Look for new housing | Arrange for removal of furniture |
| Write obituary | Do number crunching for future housing. | Put on sites to sell |
| Write Send off | Determine charitable org for donors | Take pictures of and label items |
| Pickup Ashes and death certificates | Determine what to do with flowers | Determine pricing. |
| Get money from Insurance Cancel driver’s license (if necessary) | Terminate Mobile Phone Fwd mail to the Estate | Call maintenance. Spvr for removal of items not sold or given away |
| Pay funeral director | Call Moving company to store furniture | Order pkg boxes |
| Pay balances on debts | Determine new apartment | Start Packing |
| Prepare for memorial | Call moving company ( ) to move | |
| Write thank you notes as they come in | Establish Moving date | |
| Say goodbyes & Pack |
Please note that there both online resources and books available for sale that outline what has to be done. These books also help you to manage your loved one’s estate without the use of a lawyer. This helps when there is not much money in the estate. If you hire an attorney to manage your will, he will arrange to get paid first, and you the executor may not have anything left.
So, whether or not you hire a lawyer, always pay the Funeral Director first. And order about 25 death certificates from the funeral director so you will have enough to take care of your estate business. They will have the original seal on them. And get the same number of Surrogates letters from the County Surrogate’s office.
Get an Estate Account at your bank. They will help you set up a checking account so that you can pay the bills of the deceased. You will have to get a State L-8 form and an EIN Number, provide the death certificate of the deceased and proof that you are the executor of the estate.
If there isn’t a lot of money in the estate after you pay the funeral director, total up all the debts, and then prorate the distributions to the creditors. In other words, give the most to the largest creditor and the least to the smallest creditor. And when the money is gone (depleted), it’s gone.
Write each creditor and inform him or her of the situation and tell the creditor what percentage of the money he or she is getting. If necessary, tell them how you arrived at that percentage. You are not liable for any of the deceased debts unless you were a co-owner or you co-signed for that product or loan. Keep copious notes in case you get audited.
CONCLUSION
You can eliminate a lot of stress with some planning ahead when dealing with funeral arrangements.
Was this helpful?. If you have anything you’d like to add or share that would help others, feel free to tell us. We all are a work in progress.
God bless you and may He comfort you as you keep your eyes upon Jesus.